ENDOR – In a new study released Wednesday, the inhabitants of the moon of Endor known as “Ewoks” have been deemed harmless.
The study, funded in part by the University of Endor and the Empire, drew its findings based on direct observation of the fuzzy woodland creatures.  When asked about the motivation for research on Ewoks, a spokesperson for the Empire-funded study stated, “Well, it’s purely scientific.  It’s not like there is any kind of hidden bunker there or anything.  Let’s move on.”